There are almost always both good and not-so-good things happening at any given time. What you choose to focus on is a big factor in the happiness equation. Sometimes people put too much focus on the past. If you choose to focus your mind on a negative event from your past and re-experience those emotions, you can actually create a trapped emotion about that event, even long after it has happened.
Stop for a moment and think about your own thoughts. During any given day of your life, do your thoughts tend to be more positive or more negative? Do you choose to dwell on favorable, positive things and decide to feel grateful, content and joyful or do you choose to dwell on negative emotions?
If you are in a troubled relationship, for example, there are almost always a number of good things that you can think of that you appreciate in your partner. Focusing on the good things about a relationship and giving your attention to its positive aspects can help to create gratitude and happiness for you. To do so may even open a way to create positive change, especially if it is your intention to build and reserve the relationship.
By contrast, whenever we place our focus on our problems and on the things that are going wrong in our lives, we end up creating more negativity.
I saw a movie once where a wise teacher told his student, "Remember, your focus determines your reality." How true that statement really is! You can see a glass as being half-full or half-empty, but seeing the glass as half-full is more empowering and will create a more positive reality for you. Feeling positive emotions about what you want will literally help you to create your dreams.
When you visualize your life the way you want it to be and feel the way that it feels as if you already had your dream, you will always find opportunities to create the things that make you happy right in front of you. Focusing on the things that you do not want and feeling negatively will either create or perpetuate those same negative problems in your life.
For example, if you spend your time thinking about how you can not seem to find love, the signal you are sending out to the universe is that you can not find love. As a result, you will not find it, or it will at least be more difficult to find.
We are constantly radiating our thoughts into the cosmos. I believe that these thoughts fill the immensity of space, and that they are not limited by the speed of light or any other limitation. Our thoughts are powerful, and what we think and feel is what we create.
When you free yourself of negative trapped emotions, you will find it easier to choose the positive emotions that will help you to attract what you really want in your life.
Have you ever made a statement like, "My husband makes me so mad …" or "That made me so depressed …" or "That put me in such a bad mood"? Statements like these are very common. If you listen to yourself more closely you might catch yourself saying something similar. If you stop and think about statements like these, you will realize they're quite ridiculous. The fact is that nobody can make you feel any emotion that you do not choose to feel.
Things that happen to you do not really determine the emotions that you feel. While you may not have conscious control over all of the events that affect your life, you do have the ability to choose how you think, feel, and act. No matter what happens, you absolutely choose the emotions that you feel.
Many of us unwittingly become victim to our emotions at times. You may not believe that you are in control of how you feel. Negative emotions can emerge so quickly that it may appear as if there is no time to choose a different emotion than the natural reaction emotion that just seems to come out of now. If you are late for an appointment, you may automatically feel anxious. If someone fears you rudely, you might automatically feel miffed. When you are insulted or upset, you may immediately feel resentful or angry.
While you may have always responded in a certain negative way to a given situation, your past negative responses do not have to be the same as your future responses. You have a choice every time you need to deal with or confront something negative. You can choose to react how you have always reacted or you can choose differently. The past does not have to equal the future.
The reality about emotions is that you always choose them. You always choose how you feel. Always. Becoming aware of this is in itself quite empowering. You are the author of your own emotional experiences. You can choose whatever emotion you want in any situation you are faced with. It takes some practice, and it's not always easy, but it can be done.
The next time you find yourself filled with a negative emotion, stop and think about the process you went through to arrive at that feeling. It may seem like the emotion chose you, but you really did choose the emotion.