How to Put a V8 Motor in a Corvair

Sometimes a challenge is just that and no more. Not practical maybe but fun nonetheless. I owned at the time, a small shop repair shop where I would tinker with cars and motorcycles and make a few dollars as well. One afternoon during a bull session with some buddies, one of them said it would be neat if we could put a V8 motor in one of my Corvair cars. I had several of them and loved to tinker with the Monza model which was Chevy’s souped up version of this rear engined car. The Corvair had no independent frame and was one of the first uni-body cars on the market. Extremely lightweight, the six cylinder motor with the factory blower made the car zip right along. It really was a silly looking car in the first years of production, kinda boxy and square. Later models became more streamlined but suffered the same engineering problems of the early years and quickly the car faded into obscurity. I had one car with no motor and the body was not in the best of shape. I remember saying I could put the V8 in that car and the guys quickly put me to the challenge.

My shop had a pretty good assortment of tools, torches, welders, jacks and power hand tools that allowed me to make just about anything in metal. A big drill press, a good vise and tons of nuts and bolt

assortments put most of what I needed at hand. After the guys left the thought of doing this V8 conversion nagged at me and I found myself checking out the car to see if it was really possible. Putting the motor in the car could always be done but I thought how about doing it so you could not tell from the outside that the car was altered? At least until you started it up. There was no way I was going to be able to make that V8 motor sound like the wimpy six cylinder factory motor.

The first item on the agenda was to remove all the factory drive train components. Since the motor was already gone, the rear end, including the wheels were a snap to remove. I had a Chevy V8 short block that I could use for test fitting the engine into the trunk. The trunk of a Corvair was in the front of the car. A major amount of sheet metal had to be removed to squeeze the engine down into the truck compartment. I had to mock up the motor with some heads and intake manifold to assure the trunk lid (hood) would close after the engine was in place. Once I managed to get the engine into the trunk and was satisfied with it’s location, motor mounts became the next item to complete. Since there was no frame under the car I had to fabricate a partial sub-frame that was able to accept bolt-on motor mounts. I had several transmissions to choose from including a used manual three speed Chevy unit. This was a direct bolt-on to the V8 so in it went. Making a tail mount for the trans was nothing more than some three inch channel iron that spanned from one side of the car to the other. So far with the doors and hood closed the car looked stock. I purchased a used small pickup truck rear end and began altering it to fit under the Corvair body. No easy task I can say. Concealing fourteen inch wheels where thirteens were before required even more modification to the cars sheet metal including new wheel wells and interior wheel covers.

With the three major components of the drive train now mounted in the car, I was able to start on all the smaller items that a car needs to run. The drive shaft had to be custom made as it was less than three

feet long and needed a mid-point universal to offset the different heights of the transmission and the rear end. The radiator was made from an old V8 Chevy unit but had to be altered to be able to lay on its side. A friend of my Dads owned the local radiator repair shop and was more than wiling to do the alterations at almost no cost as he too thought the car was pretty neat. Wiring the car in those days was a simple task as there were none of the bells and whistles in cars today. No computers, no special sensors for this and that. Just whatever a car needed to run and work the lights and so on. I retained all the Chevy factory lights, turn signals and so on and really just needed to wire the engine components and battery. I placed the battery in the rear of the car as even then I realized the car was going to be light in the rear. What an understatement that was.

The conversion took about four months to do as I remember. There were a few bugs to work out of course as I had no engineering staff to advise me what I was doing wrong but all in all the bugs were pretty minor. The first time I started the car the thrill of hearing the motor growl under that hood cannot be described. The first time I put the car in gear and drove it around the property was a real kick. I purchased license plates for the car and drove it for a couple of weeks to work out the kinks and have time to complete some type of interior. I added only one other bucket seat as the car was not a touring car but would certainly be fun at the local drag strip. I clearly remember the first time I actually drove the car to my buddies house to show him the V8 motor in the car and take him for a ride. On a back road, holding one foot on the brake pedal and punching the gas with the other, I was able to smoke the tires with no effort at all. From a slow roll or moving at 40 MPH, punching the gas pedal would squeal the tires and create tire smoke instantly. The car was a real gas.

I drove the car that summer and had a ball taking it to Stewart’s drive-in in Paramus, New Jersey on Friday and Saturday nights. It was fun to have other guys laugh at the car and ask to race for papers. After a few races the laughter stopped. I didn’t take their papers but my little Corvair was a hit that summer with all the custom car guys. I sold the car that winter to a young fella who wanted to complete the interior and exterior paint. He drove the car for quite a while and then I lost track of it’s where abouts. I had already moved on to another project but I had proven that you could squeeze a V8 motor into a stock Corvair body.

Pete Ackerson

What Is An Abstract Noun? – 7 Activities That Focus On Identifying Abstract Nouns

Abstract nouns refer to a state, concept or feeling and cannot be perceived by any of the five senses. If you want your students to be able to identify them then your students need to spend time playing with them. Here are 7 classroom activities that will get your students exploring and manipulating abstract nouns.

1. List 10 on the board and ask 1 or 2 students at a time to come out the front and act them out. For a fun twist, the student at the front could be shown the word and the class must guess what it is. Here are 10 words you could use: anger, fear, love, jealousy, joy, sadness, wealth, poverty, marriage and slavery.

2. Write abstract nouns on the board and ask your students to think of ones with the opposite meaning. Here are 10 words you could use: trust, stupidity, sanity, pride, beauty, calm, crime, curiosity, laughter and happiness.

3. Write 3 headings on the board: Feelings, Ideas, and Qualities. Challenge your students to list abstract nouns under each heading. This works especially well with small groups competing against each other -give them 30 minutes and a large poster size sheet of paper to write the lists on.

4. Many abstract nouns refer to feelings. Challenge your students to think of similes for happiness and unhappiness. Let them think of the words on their own for a few minutes and then let them look in a thesaurus. They should come up with words like joy, delight, satisfaction, excitement, pleasure, cheerfulness, enjoyment, contentment, glee, and laughter for happiness and sadness, disappointment, misery, sorrow, depression and gloom for unhappiness. To extend the activity, each student could be given one of the words to write in a sentence and share with the class.

5. Write sentences that combine the abstract nouns with concrete words. For example, affection is like a night light. Ask your students to write or discuss reasons why this is so. Their suggestions may be that they both make you feel safe, help you see obstacles, need to be powered by something, don’t cost very much and come in all different shapes. You could try, isolation is like a cheesy pizza, happiness is like a new book or freedom is like a warty toad.

6. Jumble the letters up and challenge your students to work out what they are. Try RGNAE (anger), OJY (joy), ARAMRIGE (marriage), OERFEDM (freedom), HLEWAT (wealth), ETIXECEMNT (excitement).

7. Write them on post-it-notes and give them to small groups of students. Challenge each group to stick the notes in an appropriate place in the classroom. This works well if the children are given time to tell the class why they put the notes where they did. Love may end up on a heater (because they are both warm) and loneliness may end up on a table far at the back of the class.

Activities like these, that give your students opportunities to practice identifying and using abstract nouns will strengthen the ability of your students to use them in their own writing.

12 Amazing Uses for Pepper You Didn’t Know About

Various forms of pepper have long been used to satisfy our culinary experience but as it turns out, there is a lot more to pepper than meets the eye.

Let’s have a look at some of the things pepper can be used for other than to spice foods:

1. If your old clunker is starting to get a slow leak in the radiator, pour some black pepper into it plug up small holes. This will buy you time to get it fixed properly.

2. Are you having trouble with biting ants in your yard? You don’t need to use harsh chemicals for this. All you need is about a half cup of black or cayenne pepper poured down the hole and voila, no more ant problem.

3. This also holds true for hungry ants looking for something sweet in your kitchen. You can put white pepper in their path and they will disappear thinking there are no meals here.

4. No sooner have you planted your vegetable garden than those pesky hungry bugs arrive ready to undermine all your hard work. Here is a recipe that not only keeps insects away but also animals.

– 2 tbsp cayenne pepper

– 2 large cloves of garlic

– 4 medium sized onions

– 4 cups water

– In a blender or food processor, blend until completely smooth. Then add about a gallon of water and you are ready to spray your plants.

5. Want to keep your colors bright when you do laundry? A tsp of pepper in your wash will keep your colors bright a lot longer. It can also keep your colors from bleeding. There are not many products that can do that.

6. Do you have problems with your sinuses? Do you have a cold? Cayenne pepper in your favorite food can unclog you and get you cleared up in no time. Or, mix liquid pepper with eucalyptus and put it in your steamer to sooth and unclog your sinuses . (Your health food store should carry these drops. If they don’t, ask them to.)

7. Help your liver detoxify with this early morning drink;

– 1 lemon squeezed,

– ¼ tsp cayenne pepper,

– 1 cup filtered water,

– 1 tsp maple syrup

When you drink this every morning you begin to look forward to it.

8. For arthritis pain you can make your own homemade warming massage to sooth where it hurts.

Recipe: Mix together

1 dropper of almond oil (Always use a carrier oil such as almond, jojoba or olive oil)

2 drops of pepper

1 drop ginger

2 drops lavender

Massage on the affected area and feel the warmth working.

9. If you feel the beginning of a migraine headache coming on then immediately put about 4 to 5 droppers full of pepper in water and drink. If you don’t have the pepper tincture then you can use about a ¼ to ½ teaspoon of cayenne pepper in a half glass of water. Repeat after a half hour if you have any remaining pain.

10. According to Dr. Richard Schulze, M.H., N.D., if someone is having a heart attack, you can revive them by putting 4 to 5 droppers full of cayenne pepper tincture directly to the mouth. If you don’t have the tincture, use a tsp. of cayenne pepper and some water and continue to give it every five minutes until the person has recovered. They may sputter and choke a bit but according to Dr. Schulze, he has seen many miracles of people recovering completely.

11. Do you have a problem with squirrels eating the feed in your bird feeder? Cayenne pepper yet saves the day again. Sprinkling it in the feed does not affect the birds. They apparently have a high tolerance for the pepper and the vitamin A in it improves their plumage.

12. If you have problems with rodent chewing on cables then you can rub pepper tincture on them and they won’t go anywhere near it.

So there you have it. I’m sure we will discover more wonderful uses for this versatile spice.

Building A Killer Train Table

So you've decided to bite the bullet and construct your own model railroad layout, and necessarily, the table the railway seats upon. Many people start by building their first layouts on a table top, and while this is simplicity personified, it does have its limits. The biggest of these drawbacks is that everything must be on top, and nothing can be below ground level (or table level) that's when most modelers realize the need to build their own tables to be able to accommodate any sort of scenery and landscape they could dream up.

First, you need to plan carefully the size, relative weight of different sections, and design of your new layout. If one section is more scenery intensive, it will require more attention as to support. An L-girder support system has become the standard way to support your model layout, and can be adapted to almost any configuration, so providing you with all the strength your layout will need. L-girder bench work is very strong, and still about as inexpensive as you can do. It's a very functional structure, and is easily put together. It is a platform consisting of girders, cross braces and joists, all working together to do the job. Most of the time the joists are about 18 inches apart, but they do not need to be evenly spaced.

Try and use care when selecting the lumber for both the support as well as the actual tabletop. Obviously you'll want flat pieces that will carry your roadbed without problem. Take care in the support pieces as well. Cheaper grades of lumber will warp over time, and I do not have to tell you what that could mean to your layout. If your layout is larger than a standard 4 X 8 piece of plywood, you'll still want to consider having each piece no larger than that for easier transportation you should have to move the layout. Assemble all the joints between the bench work cross members as well as the support risers with wood screws accessible from beneath the layout. This way, you do not have to ruin scenery when looking for some random screw lost in the trees! Make doubly careful not to split the wood in your supports by either using too large of screws or by poor placement of same.

Carefully locate any cuts you want to make for either access or for scenery, and make sure these fit into your overall support scheme. There are varying schools of thought as to whether to saw your holes in the tabletop after the track is in place or before. For me, I think it is better to do it all beforehand, as the very act of sawing, regardless of the quality of your tool, can possibly send enough vibrations through your layout to loosen track and ballast, making your previously a smooth running operation into a clackety-clack mess. Just my 2 cents.

Most tabletop layouts are at about 48 to 55 inches high. Obviously, this is something you can control, and if you've bolted the main support legs in place, (instead of screws or nails) you can even change it at the drop of a wrench! You'll want to try and make it so that even the tops of the highest hills and grades are visible without a step-stool.

Building a killer train table is nothing if not pre-planning. Take some time with yours and you'll be most pleased!

Personal Branding: The Lighthouse Branding Model

More and more people are talking about the importance of personal branding, both in career searching and in career development. Effective personal branding not only makes you stand out from the crowd to employers and recruiters, it can also increase your job security by communicating your value as a leader and team player to your organization.

What is personal branding?

Personal branding is the process of identifying the unique and differentiating value that you bring to an organization, team and / or project and communicating it in a professionally memorable and consistent manner in all of your actions, both online and offline, to all current and prospective stakeholders in your career.

The Lighthouse Personal Branding Model

The lighthouse is a great model for breaking down the branding process into four key steps: the foundation, the beacon, the tower and the beam.


Your foundation is your unarguable strengths and experience in your chosen area. To identify your own foundation, write down the strengths that differentiate you from the rest and ask your friends, family and colleagues / managers to do the same for you. Identify the top three to five overlapping strengths that support the career direction you want to pursue.


Your beacon is the memorable and consistent communication of your strengths and experience. Now that you have identified your foundation, it's time to create your beacon by finding a word or phrase that represents these strengths and can become your brand. Develop a short pitch that can follow your brand, describing your strengths in more detail. Ensure that your word or phrase is capable and can change with your direction.


Simply put, your tower is your visibility, reach and presentation, both online and offline, which support the beacon. This is really everything you do to proactively build your personal brand. The higher you build your tower with your efforts, the more visible you will be to potential career stakeholders. Here are some ways to proactively build your brand and credibility in front of your target audience:

  • Create a LinkedIn profile and follow the suggested steps to complete your profile 100 percent, making sure you include your personal brand and pitch in your subtitle and summary sections.
  • Create a Google account and profile for improved search engine optimization.
  • Include your personal brand on your resume, cover letter, business cards, email signature, voicemail message and across your other social networks, such as Twitter and Facebook.
  • Consider creating a personal website / blog site where you can house all of your information, including experience, education, skills, honors, entrepreneurial efforts and more.
  • Start your own blog with a unique point of view on your industry / area of ​​interest.
  • Contribute value in your book or product reviews, your tweets, your comments on other blog posts, your own blog articles or articles for print publications, your discussions in LinkedIn Groups and your advice via LinkedIn Answers or other forums.
  • Start a company full-time or on the side with relevant and valuable products / services / resources for the industry.
  • Publish and offer print and / or electronic publications.
  • Get quoted in the media by joining HARO (Help a Reporter Out) and contributing advice, experiences and insights to reporters and journalists seeking expert sources.


Your beam is your career direction and more active personal branding and career search strategy. It involves you gaining and projecting a strong understanding of where you want to go, what you want to pursue and how you will pursue it. First, you need to determine what functional area, geography and industries / companies you want to target. Then, you need to actively network your brand with potential career stalkholders. Here are some ways to start:

  • Join associations or networking groups within your industry and attend events to meet new contacts and build your target network. Be sure to share your personal brand with those new contacts.
  • Conduct informational interviews with target network contacts (whether or not you're seeking a job) and share your personal brand with them in your introductions.
  • Find ways to bring fellow industry thought leaders together on a project or at an event.
  • Find ways to contribute to the projects or events of fellow industry experts.
  • Get recommended on LinkedIn and display testimonials from customers, clients and partners

Personal Application

I used this model to help develop my own personal brand during my MBA career search. Having identified my foundation to be my endless energy, out-of-the-box creativity, relationship building and problem solving, I looked for a word that could pull all of those strengths together into one memorable brand message. The beacon I chose was "generator" as I generate energy, creativity, relationships and solutions to problems. I was pursuing a career in marketing and brand management, and therefore, I became a brand and marketing generator. I proactively built my tower by incorporating my brand directly into my online profiles, my resumes and my entrepreneurial efforts. I then took a more active approach, targeting the "beam" by incorporating my personal brand in my interview responses, networking introductions and informational outreach outreach. It was this process that helped me successfully secure my current employment, and this model continues to help guide all of my professional and entrepreneurial ventures.

As you create, build and improve on your personal brand, keep the lighthouse in mind as a visual model and guide to personal branding success.

Basic Components of Cellular Systems

1. Introduction

There are various cellular systems in the world, such as the GSM and CDMA. The design of these cellular systems are complicated but the architecture of most cellular systems can be broken down into six basic components.

In this article, I will illustrate the six basic components that can be found in most cellular systems.

2. Six basic components of Cellular Systems

The architecture of most cellular systems can be broken down into the following six components:

a) Mobile Station (MS)

A mobile station is basically a mobile/wireless device that contains a control unit, a transceiver and an antenna system for data and voice transmission. For example, in GSM networks, the mobile station will consist of the mobile equipment (ME) and the SIM card.

b) Air Interface Standard

There are three main air interface protocols or standards: frequency division multiple access (FDMA), time division multiple access (TDMA) and code division multiple access (CDMA). These standards are basically the medium access control (MAC) protocols that define the rules for entities to access the communication medium.

These air interface standards allow many mobile user to share simultaneously the finite amount of radio channels.

c) Base Station (BS)

A base station is a fixed station in a mobile cellular system used for radio communications with mobile units. They consist of radio channels and transmitter and receiver antenna mounted on a tower.

d) Databases

Another integral component of a cellular system is the databases. Databases are used to keep track of information like billing, caller location, subscriber data, etc. There are two main databases called the Home Location Register (HLR) and Visitor Location Register (VLR). The HLR contains the information of each subscriber who resides in the same city as the mobile switching center (MSC). The VLR temporarily stores the information for each visiting subscriber in the coverage area of a MSC. Thus, the VLR is the database that supports roaming capability.

e) Security Mechanism

The security mechanism is to confirm that a particular subscriber is allowed to access the network and also to authenticate the billing.

There are two databases used for security mechanism: Equipment Identify Register (EIR) and Authentication Center (AuC). The EIR identifies stolen or fraudulently altered phones that transmit identity data that does not match with information contained in either the HLR or VLR. The AuC, on the other hand, manages the actual encryption and verification of each subscriber.

f) Gateway

The final basic component of a cellular system is the Gateway. The gateway is the communication links between two wireless systems or between wireless and wired systems. There are two logical components inside the Gateway: mobile switching center (MSC) and interworking function (IWF).

The MSC connects the cellular base stations and the mobile stations to the public switched telephone network (PSTN) or other MSC. It contains the EIR database.

The IWF connects the cellular base stations and the mobile stations to Internet and perform protocol translation if needed.

3. Conclusion

This article aims to provide an introductory guide to the architecture of a typical cellular system and identify the six basic components found in most cellular systems. This article offers an insight towards how a cellular system is designed although different cellular systems may have variations in their own implementations.

Information About Masonic Regalia

Buying masonic regalia can be very confusing. Whether you are just joining Freemasonry, or becoming a member of another degree or side order, you need advice so ensuring that you are wearing is correct at all times.

Listed below are the main Orders and Degrees:

Holy Royal Arch (Chapter)
Royal Ark Mariners (RAM)
Rose Croix
Knight Templar & Malta
Allied Masonic Degrees (AMD)
Order of the Secret Monitor (OSM)
Royal & Select Masters (RSM)
Red Cross of Constantine (RCC)
Royal Order of Scotland (ROS)
Holy Sepulcher And St. John The Evangelist
Societas Rosicruciana in Anglia (SRIA)
St Thomas of Acon
The Worshipful Society of Operatives (Operatives)

Not sure what you need to join Freemasonry, or other Orders or Degrees?

Please the handy list below detailing what you need at each stage of you Masonic career:


Nothing is required until the candidate has passed through the three degrees, other than a Dark Suit and White Gloves & Black Tie


Master Masons Apron

Other Items Which May Be Of Use

Black Regalia Case
Ritual Book


Worshipful Masters Apron


Past Masters Collar
Past Masters Collar Jewel


Dress Apron and Collar
Past Rank Collar Jewel
only required if it is a Past Rank

Undress Apron and Collar
not essential, but useful

Provincial Regalia Case


Full Dress Apron and Collar
Undress Apron and Collar
Past Rank Collar Jewel
Grand Rank Regalia Case


Companions Apron and Sash
Breast Jewel

Other items which may be of use:

Royal Arch Cuff Links
Ritual Book
White Gloves
Lapel Pin


Principals Apron and Sash
Breast Jewel


Past Principal's Collar
Past Principal's Collar Jewel


Provincial Apron and Sash
Provincial Collaret
Past Provisional Collarette Jewel
if Past Rank

Provincial Breast Jewel


Supreme Grand Chapter Apron and Sash
Supreme Grand Chapter Collar
Supreme Grand Chapter Past Rank Collar Jewel



Mark MM Apron

Mark Breast Jewel


Mark Cuff Links
Silver Gilt Cufflinks
Lapel Pin


Mark WM Apron


Mark PM Collar
Mark PM Collar Jewel


Mark Provincial Apron & Collar

Mark Undress Apron & Collar.
Not essential, but useful

Mark Past Rank Collar Jewel

only required if Past Rank

Mark Provincial Breast Jewel.


Mark Full Dress Apron and Collar
Mark Undress Apron and Collar
Mark Past Rank Collar Jewel



RAM Apron
RAM Breast Jewel

RAM Cuff Links
Lapel Pin


Name for the Person in the chair:
Worshipful Commander

WCN Apron


PCN Collar
PCN Collar Jewel

PCN Presentation Breast Jewel
(sometimes Presented by Lodge).


(Egypt Equivalent)
What needs to be known.
RANK: The Rank is Provincial ACTING or PAST:
The Same PROVINCE: No Difference for Ranks

Provincial Collaret
Provincial Collarette Jewel


RAM Grand Rank Apron
RAM Grand Rank Collarette
RAM Grand Rank Collarette Jewel
RAM Grand Rank Collar
Grand Rank Collar Jewel



18th Degree Collar Hand Embroidered
18th Degree Collar Jewel

Tie Black with White Spots
Tie Black Embroidered with Red Rose (Not always acceptable)
Lapel Pin


None a Collarlette and Jewel will be Provided by the Chapter


30th Degree Sash
30th Degree Collarette
30th Degree Collarette Jewel (Eagle)
30th Degree Sash Star (Optional)


31st Degree Collar
31st Degree Collarette
31st Degree Collar Jewel (Star)
31st Degree Collarlett Jewel (Eagle)


32nd Degree Collar
32nd Degree Collar Jewel (Star)
32nd Degree Collarette
32nd Degree Collarlett Jewel (Eagle)



Mantle and Tunic
Belt and Frog
Breast Cross
Black Gloves

Hat Size, Height and Chest Size


KT Regalia Case or Badge
Sword Cover


Usual time before this is required: Usually within the year

Malta Breast Cross


Preceptors Mantle & Tonic
Preceptors Cap and Star Badge
Preceptors Sword
Preceptors Sash


Past Preceptor's Jewel
not essential

Past Preceptor's Collarette
only required if Jewel is bought


Provincial Sash
Mantle Badge


Great Priory Sash
Great Priory Mantle Badge
Great Priory Cap Cross



Companion's Breast Cross
Companion's Sash
Usually Loaned by the conclave


Black Tie Embroidered with Red Cross
Lapel Pin
Ritual Book


KHS Breast Jewel
KHS Sash


Sash Altered to Commander (Black Crown added)
Present and Past Sovereign's Breast Jewel
Commander and Past Commander's Breast Jewel


The Same as going into the Chair


Divisional Sash
Sash Altered to Divisional

REGALIA REQUIRED FOR THIS is provided by Grand Lodge

Humor – Basic Joke Construction

I highly recommend that you read the first article in this series before continuing, for obvious reasons.

In the last article we talked about the key ingredient in humor – the element of surprise – and how creating humor does not start with finding the funny in life, but rather finding the truth in life. Today we are going to start there and travel down the road of joke construction.

Finding the truth

Humor starts with the things we find to be true about life. At this stage of the game we are not looking to get a laugh. We are looking for the things we find to be true of life that other people can refer to. That's a broad topic. So let me make it easier and tell you to look for those things in life that you think are weird, hard, scary or stupid. These are attitude words and I'm not the first or the last to use them. Just find a topic and ask yourself what you find to be weird, hard, scary, or stupid about that topic.

For example: What's hard about marriage?

If you're married, I would imagine that some things come to mind.

How about: What's scary about drinking and driving?

Or: What's weird about television commercials?

Let me remind you that the goal is not to think funny, but to think truth. The funny will come later. Stick to your attitude words. I recommend that you get a spiral notebook to start collecting all these random thoughts because you will do a great bit of writing before you hit on something you'll want to keep. When I sit down to write, I like to think of a topic and just let the creative process go. Sometimes I write about what it was like being an overweight teenager – what was weird, hard, scary or stupid. Sometimes I write about being the oldest kid, or being an older parent.

Two things to help you when you go through this process:

1. Think of things other people will relate to. They do not have to have gone through that exact situation, but you want to find something they can sympathize with. You might not want to talk about what is hard about growing up owning a camel because chances are good nobody in your audience can relate to that. But they can relate to losing a pet, or wanting some kind of strange animal as a pet.

2. The more specific you get your topic, the better. Instead of talking about dating, why not talk about internet dating. Instead of using the topic of parenthood, why not talk about what it's like to be a lazy parent. When you pick a general topic, keep in mind that hundreds of other comedians are falling on that same general topic. To be unique (which is key in comedy) you need to get more specific.

I have found that some of the best topics are those that make you annoyed, irritated, angry, etc. Chances are good that you're not alone in that way of thinking. Again, pick the topics that most people will have experienced.

This is actually the topic for the next article, so let's leave this and jump into joke construction and later we'll go back to the process of finding topics, which is better done once you've learned to craft a standard joke.

Basic joke construction

Let me begin by saying there is no standard joke. There are many different formulas floating around out there created by different people as they explain their own creative path to joke construction. Find the ones that work best for you. Read the books. I recommend Judy Carter's The Comedy Bible for starters. Then get Greg Dean's book on Standup Comedy. These are two of my favorites, but you have a lot to choose from. Study. Practice. And WRITE!

Jokes are told and delivered in millions of different ways – almost as unique as the individual creating the joke. But if you peel it all away, you will find that every joke consist of two parts: the setup and the punch. You will hear it called different things by different people. But it still means the same thing – two parts, the setup and the punch.

The setup is the serious part of the joke. This is where you set your audience up. This is where you force them to make an assumption. Many comedians will mistakenly try to make their setup funny. Do not. Make it true.

For example:
I lost fifty pounds.

There is nothing funny about this statement.

Here's the punch:
Oh, not all at once. I lost ten, gained twenty …. lost five, gained two ….

Okay, so it's not the best joke in the world, but it's an example of how a joke has two parts. And, by the way, the setup can be one line or a whole paragraph. Whatever it takes.

The punch is the second part of the joke where you surprise your audience. Remember in the first article where I talked about shattering expectations? Well, here you go. The punch is where you say what they did not expect you to say. This is the funny part. And there is more than one way to surprise your audience.

And that's it. I know, sounds too easy to be true. Trust me, it is anything but easy. It takes work and a lot of writing. It takes writing twenty bad jokes to get to one good one. But if you continue to work through the process, you will get better at it. So let me leave so you can get to work.

But before I go, here are some quick jokes that I'm building right here on the spot, simply by creating a setup and then adding a punch. Keep in mind that some will not seem as funny on paper as they would be delivered on a stage.

My boyfriend and I have been together three years.
Oh, he does not know it yet.

I bought a cream that was guaranteed to get rid of unwanted bulges.
I put it on my husband.

I finally got my son to sleep in his own bed.
About time ….. the kid's fifteen!

Okay, I know I said I was leaving, but one more helpful hint before I go. Write a setup (any setup) and then stop (before you try to think of funny things) and think about what we assume to be true of this setup. When I said above that my boyfriend and I have been together for three years, you assume that he knows it.

The more you start writing setups and punches, the more you will start to see ways that you can tweak your setup to create a better or different surprise. Find words that have double meaningings. If you're a pun man, then start playing with your puns.

Here's an old old old joke. I can not remember who wrote it, but it was not me. And I've heard many people do it.

The doctor told me I had two weeks to live. I said, "Doctor I want a second opinion." He said, "Fine. You're also ugly."

Okay, I'm really going now. At the count of three. One …. two …

How to Keep Your Man Wanting More – 4 Tips on Building Emotional Attraction With a Man

The only way to keep your man wanting more is building attraction with him. I am not talking about physical attraction either but you know that already …

Physical attraction is important but only in the sense that men are visual and it helps to look good to get their attention but looking pretty alone will not keep his interest for very long.

Attraction goes a whole lot deeper than just looking good.

I am sure that you have noticed that there are many gorgeous women who always seem to be having relationship problems so clearly looking good has nothing to do with having a lasting, healthy, happy relationship.

The attraction a man has for you is nothing that he can control either. In other words, he will either feel it for you or he will not. Unfortunately, there is no middle ground with this one.

But because it is nothing that he can control, we can use that knowledge to our advantage!

So what kind of attraction do you need to build with the man in your life and how do you do that?

You need to build massive emotional attraction with him. This is how you inspire a man to be interested in being with you and only you.

The emotional attraction you build with him has to do with how you make him feel when he is around you.

In essence, you have to make him feel good at all times so that he has fun when he is with you and remembers the good times you spend together when he is AWAY from you.

That way when he is away from you, he keeps thinking about you and every time he thinks of you he can not help but smile and wonder when next he will be able to talk to you or see you.

It's easy to build this attraction if you remember that if he feels good being with you, he will stay. If he feels bad being with you, he will go (and sometimes faster than you can blink).

So how do you build emotional attraction with a man?

1. Play with him. Make sure that you have lots of fun together. Always keep him smiling. When he is smiling, everything is good and "la vie est belle" as they say. This tip may sound incredibly simplistic but it is really very powerful.

2. Give him as much space as you can. Enjoy the time you have when you are together. Have fun and live in the moment but do NOT crowd him. Pull back sometimes and allow him to miss you, to wonder about you and come come looking for you. Let him have fun with that sometimes. Enjoy the magic when he finds you.

3. Be interesting and unpredictable. Be provocative sometimes with what you say and do so that he never quite knows what you will say or do next. That way he can not help but think about you because you keep him guessing.

4. Take things slowly to the point where he is not sure how into you are. It does not matter how much fun you are having with him, do not try to rush ahead by forcing your feelings on him. The key here is staying one step behind him and two steps ahead so that he is not quite sure what you want from him. This is how you keep him on his toes.

Building emotional attraction is as much fun for you as it is for him and in the end you both get what you want!

Click on the link below for more insight into building attraction with the guy in your life!

Pelvic Floor Exercises – Naturally Tighten & Strengthen Your Vagina

So you want to tighten your vagina? Maybe you've recently had a child, or maybe you want to tighten you vaginal muscles to make your love life absolutely explosive. Either way, it's possible with completely natural exercises. Yes, there are toys that you can purchase to help you make your vagina tighter, but they are by no means necessary, and can be very expensive.

How Pelvic Floor Exercises Work

Your vagina is one large muscle. If you work it out, it can become extremely strong, but if you do not, it will not only be weak, but you may develop incontinence, among other things. Worst of all, sometimes, is that your sex life will not be as good as it could be. In fact, some women actually report having their FIRST orgasm as a result of tightening and strengthening their muscles. That's how important strengthening your vagina truly is. Here are a few benefits that you can expect:

  • Have More Orgasms
  • Have Stronger Orgasms
  • Have More Control Over When You Have Orgasms
  • Tease Your Man By Clenching Your Muscles Around His Penis
  • Prevent Incontinence
  • If You've Recently Had A Child, Tighten And Strengthen Your Muscles
  • Feel Confident Around Your Lover- Never Again Feel Self-Conscious About Your Tightness

Make Your Vagina So Tight That You Can Write Your Name With a Pencil & Then Snap It In Half!

I'm serious!

Women who work out their vagina and develop their pelvic floor have extremely powerful muscles. They tease and torture their man until he can no longer take it and loses his mind. Most women will certainly have intercourse without being aware of their vaginal muscles. But when you work out your vagina you will become extremely aware of them during intercourse. When you're having sex, you can manipulate your lover's member in many, many ways, all of which will be extremely pleasurable. In fact, some women become so masterful that they can end their man almost instantly. In fact, what if I told you that you can invite your lover inside of you, ask him to stay still, and only with your vaginal muscles massage him to climax? Yes, it's true!

So many women do not know about tightening and strengthening their vagina, and they are, as result, missing out on the best sex of their life! Your sex life will be exponentially better. Your orgasms will be stronger and more powerful, and you will have them more frequently.

Not just that, but if you suffer from incontinence, you can completely eliminate your problems in a short period of time. These exercises also work to prevent incontinence.

  • If you want to make your sex life absolutely incredible, strengthening your pelvic floor is a sure-fire way to have the best sex of your life every night.

Can I use anything to help me strengthen my muscles?
Yes, there are many different kinds of toys and balls that you can purchase to help develop your pelvic floor muscles. Remember, these are by no means necessary, but can certainly help.

  • Ben Wa Balls
  • Smart Balls
  • Kegel Exercises

Ben Wa Balls

Ben Wa Balls are, simply put, small metal balls that you place in your vagina. They are weighed, so they require that you squeeze your vaginal muscles around them to keep them inside of you. This will help you develop your strength considerably. Many women use these balls when doing all sorts of things. Some women wear them when they're doing things around the house, while others even wear them while they're out for a jog or even on the job! They are very inexpensive, but can be a great addition to your arsenal of tightening and strengthening tools.

Smart Balls

Smart balls are larger than Ben Wa Balls, usually made of silicone, and connected with either nylon or silicone. They also come in a myriad of different colors, so there will surely be something you will like. Smart Balls are recommended for beginners because they are larger and easier to remove than Ben Wa Balls. Most have some sort of string connected for easy removal. Most women also find them more attractive, and even cute.

Kegel Exercisers

This is your most expensive option, but many exercises are made of stainless steel, so they are a lifetime. Also, they double as a regular sex toy. These exercises usually bulge around the center, which allows you to clench your vaginal muscles around it repeatedly, which will make them stronger over time.

If you are serious about strengthening your pelvic floor, doing natural vaginal exercises will have you squirming in delight every day and night. Not only will you have better orgasms, but your lover will benefit from your stronger vagina as well. So if you want to take your sex life to the next level, or if you want to bring back the awesome chemistry that you once felt with your man, start strengthening your pelvic floor today, and you'll never look back. It's the best investment into your sex life that you can make!

More Than Your Usual Presents

If you think that the handcrafted necklace you bought as a birthday gift for Mom was expensive, or that the scrapbook you made for your girlfriend already took a lot of hard work, then you most likely have not heard about these gifts. Read this short guide to some of history's most expensive, extraordinary and jaw-dropping gifts:

– The Amber Room

In pre-World War II Russia was a room whose walls was made of amber panels and had decorations of gold leaves and mirrors. Considered to be the "Eight Wonder of the World" for its sheer beauty and opulence, the Amber Room was one of the greatest attractions of Catherine the Great's Tsarkoye Selo palace.

The room however, has not always been a Russian possession. The room was originally a part of Prussian king Friedrich I's home (the Charlottenburg Palace). It was built from 1701 to 1709 by master craftsman Gottfried Wolfram and, at the time of its destruction, contained over six tonnes of the precious resin. The room found its way to Russia in 1716 after Friedrich Wilhelm I, hoping to further cement German-Prussian relations, wave the entire room to Peter the Great as a gift after the latter expressed his admiration for it's beauty.

– The Taj Mahal

Dubbed by UNESCO as "one of the most universally invited masterpieces of the world's heritage", the Taj Mahal was built as a symbol of a man's undying love for his wife. The famous structure was commissioned by Mughal emperor Shah Jahan in 1632 after the death of his wife, Mumtaz Mahal. It was to be the final resting place of the grief-stricken emperor's wife.

The grand mausoleum features a plinth, a tomb, four minarets, a mosque and an articulate gateway and took 12 years to complete. Are not you glad you could now easily buy gifts and jewelry online?

– Great Animals for the King

Most animal lovers get a puppy or a kitten as a gift, that's not the case however, when you are a monarch. Over the course of his reign, England's Henry III received a variety of great beasts as gifts from his fellow monarchs. In 1235, the Holy Roman Emperor Fredrick II sent him three leopards (Henry's royal shield of arms featured three leopards). The three great cats were then followed by a great white bear from the king of Norway in 1252 and an elephant from Louis IX in 1255.

– Imperial Easter Eggs

Thinking about buying your girlfriend a birthday gift that goes beyond the usual jewelry and flowers? Try taking a cue from Tsar Alexander III who in 1889, commissioned the famous jeweler company Faberge to make a special Easter egg for his wife, the Empress Maria Fedorovna. When folded open, the first Faberge egg (which was actually made of gem stones) opens to reveal a gold yolk, which in turn, has a golden chicken inside it. The chicken meanwhile, contains a replica of the Imperial Crown which has a tiny ruby ​​egg hanging from it.

The queen was so delicated with the exquisitely bejeweled egg that the Tsar ordered that an egg with a surprise inside was created for his wife every year.

– £ 50 Million House

While most husbands usually buy ladies perfume or a nice piece of necklace as a gift for their wives, Bernie Ecclestone, the president and CEO of Formula One Management, just had to go a few steps further. The "king of F1" proved to his wife (and the rest of the world) just how generous a husband he is by surprising his spouse with a £ 50 million palace. Located in the Kensington Palace Gardens (England's Billionaires' Row), the mansion has 12 rooms, a garage that can hold 20 cars and is close to Kensington Palace the London home of the Sultan of Brunei.

Not all of us could afford to give our husbands a vintage Ferrari car or our wives the ultimate Christmas gift for women (diamonds, what else?). Just take comfort in the fact that whatever your gift may be, as long as it comes from the heart, it will always be cherished and appreciated.

10 Tips on How to Stick to Your Fitness Routine – Be Effortlessly Fit Without Going to the Gym

There are people who find guided engaging in several exercises regularly. Some do it on daily routine while others prefer weekly. Still many hit the fitness gym three to four times weekly. No wonder they are fit. However, not everyone has the endurance to make exercise a habit and eventually become a lifestyle. For those who effortlessly visit the fitness gym, keeping fit and healthy is their motivator. Also, they share 10 tips on how to successfully stick to your fitness routine.

1. Gradually build up your activity level. Start slow with low-level exercises that can be completed in a short time. Increase your intensity as you progress.
2. Exercises must be convenient and not injurious or tiresome. For instance, if it is possible to walk briskly in going to work, you do not need to devote more time for fitness workout. It is better to enroll in a gym near your place. If the program centers on outdoor activities, prepare to have indoor activities in case the weather is bad.
3. Make it a priority. Many make it an excuse to have no time for exercises when in fact, they are just not interested. A survey revealed that people who exercise and those who do not have the same amount of leisure time, about 24 hours per week.
4. Maintain the achievement. To continuously enjoy the benefits of exercise, it must be done regularly. Missing a day or two will not hurt; however, skipping several times at the fitness gym puts you back where you first started.
5. Set a comfortable fitness level. Once the fitness goals are achieved, people are not required to keep on intensifying their program. Rather, people can engage in activity that requires less time and intensity.
6. Accept the fact that people have setbacks. But do not brood over that thought. Work from where you left and move forward.
7. Make adjustments to make life healthy. Give up smoking. Exercise can be among the best approaches to help quit smoking.
8. Enjoy the support from networks. Family, relatives and friends can be a good source of moral support. Even people at the gym can give each other encouraging words to effortlessly stick to the routine.
9. Indulge in friendly competition such as race, swimming, golf tournament, tennis match, or marathon.
10. Do not forget to reward yourself such as special night out, new clothes or a trip, after all, getting fit is an achievement.

Advice From An Event Rentals Pro: 5 Question To Always Ask Your Vendor

Anyone who has ever planned a big event knows that it can be extremely stressful. Not only do you need to coordinate the date and guest list, but you will need to work with a company who does event rents to secure things like furniture, linens, tableware, and even concessions. In addition to all the small details that will make your vision come to life, there are sure to be budgetary considerations, and no one likes surprises. While a great event planner can take much of the burden off of you, it's still very important to ask the company you will be using for event rents these questions to ensure that you not only have a wonderful party, but also know exactly what to expect in terms of costs, time required, and quality you can expect on the big day.

Are there any additional fees?

It's common when embarking up the planning process to obtain quotes from companies who do event rents in your area. Be sure when working with these sellers to ask for a complete picture of the fees that you can expect for the use of their equipment. Things like weekend fees, delivery fees, labor fees, and after-hours set up or tear down fees are sometimes not included in the original quote. To ensure you're truly comparing apples to apples on price, be sure to ask that all of these potential costs are included up front.

Do you have any discounts available?

There's no shame in asking for discounts! Some companies will offer discounted pricing during the off-season, while others will include extra services like design planning with their event rentals. It never hurts to ask.

How much time will it take to set up and tear down the equipment?

This is important to know so that you are able to coordinate with your venue and have a flawless timeline on the day of. Many venues will have rules about how early vendors can access the area. You will want to be sure that the company will be able to set up and tear down within the time allotted by your future so that you will not incur any additional fees.

Do you have a quality standard for the items you use?

It might seem like a silly question to ask, but the last thing you want on your big day is to be disappointed in the shabby-looking furniture or linens riddled with stains or wrinkles. Be sure that the company you are using has standards you are comfortable with, and they understand your expectations.

What is the best way to do this?

Quality event rentals companies have staff members on hand who are absolute experts at planning and executing amazing parties, weddings, graduations and more. If you're not sure how many tables you need, what the best way to seat your guests might be, or how to really create magic on your dance floor, ask! Take advantage of their expertise and passion for party planning and you're sure to be pleased with the results.

Asking these five questions will give you a great start at planning your special event with a reputable company that can really help make your vision come to life.

Relationships: Can The Fear Of Abandonment Cause Someone Let Anyone Into Their Life?

In the same way that it would not be a good idea for someone to put anything into their mouth; it also would not be a good idea for them to open themselves up to anyone. Therefore, the level of discernment that they show when it comes to the former will need to be shown when it comes to the latter.

If someone exercises discernment when it comes to their relationships, they are unduly going to save them a lot of trouble. Still, this does not mean that this area of ​​their life will always run smoothly; what it means is that they will not have the tension to open their front door, so to speak, to just anyone.

Two Levels

When they meet someone, it most likely will not be long until they have an idea about whether or not they want them to be a part of their life. This will apply to someone who could be a friend or someone to whom who they could have an intimate relationship with.

There will be what takes place at a conscious level and what takes place an unconscious level. One is then not going to need to rely on their intellect alone in order to know if another person is right for them, as their intuition will assist them.

Super Fast

This part of them is like an advanced computer as it does not take long to pick up information and then to send this information up to their conscious mind. Their intellect, on the other hand, is extremely slow in comparison.

This part of them will be trying to work out what another person is like based on their body language, behavior and facial expressions, for instance. What is different about their intuition is that it picks up on another person's energy.

Another Component

So, in the same way that their intellect will enable them to read a piece of paper, their intuition will enable them to read another person's energy field. However, if it was not for what is taking place at an emotional level, it would be a lot harder than them to know if another person is suitable for them.

Due to being emotionally together, this part of them is generally not going to have a negative effect on this area of ​​their life. What this means is that they are likely to feel whole and complete.

The Odd Occident

This does not mean that they will never feel needy, though, as there could be times when this is exactly how they feel. But, even if they do feel this way, it might not be enough for them to let anyone into their life.

During these moments in their life, their friends could help them to regulate how they feel. The ability that they have to handle their own emotions is also going to help them to handle the ups and down of life.

A Different Scenario

But, while there will be people who are able to exercise discernment when it comes to who they let into their life, there are going to be others who are unable to do so. When it comes to what goes into mouth, they could be fine.

Consequently, one could look back on their life and see that they have had a number friends and partners who were extremely harmful. Along with this, their life could be filled with people like this now.


Perhaps they are in a relationship with someone who is abusive, or they could be with someone who simply drains them. This person is then not going to abuse them, but what they will do is take far more than they give.

Either way, this area of ​​their life is going to have a negative effect on their whole life, making it more or less impossible for them to function at their best. What they may find is that they are unable to pay attention to the guidance that is within them.

A Strong Need

What they may find, if they were to connect to what is taking place at a defect level, is that they have a strong fear of being abandoned. Through having this fear, it will be essential for them to make sure that they are not alone.

And, as this is their main priority, they are not going to be too concerned about what another person is like. Their ability to think clearly, along with their intuition, will be put to one side.

The Best Option

The pain that one experiences by being around the wrong people is then not going to be seen as being as bad as how painful it would be if they were to not have anyone around. What this is likely to show is that one does not just have a fear of being abandoned; they are also carrying the pain of being abandoned.

One is going to have disempowering beliefs and they will have a fair amount of trauma in their body. This is likely to be the result of what took place during the beginning of their life, with this most likely being a time when they were neglected.


If one can refer to this, and they want to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer, for instance.

Russian Penis Enlargement Secrets – Myofascial Releasing

There are many methods of penis enlargement that are very obscure and unknown to the majority of the men out there. One technique we learned in Russia was Myofascial Releasing for Natural Penis Enlargement.

The tissue that covers muscles is a tough form of connective tissue called myofascia. If you have a raw steak from the butcher, sometimes parts of the meat (this is muscle) is covered by a thin white membrane. This is myofascia. Myofascia helps keep the muscle (as a whole) in a collective shell.

It’s not uncommon for people to develop “knots” in the myofascia of muscles. It is very common in the shoulder reasons for instance. Upon careful palpation (feeling) one can feel these knots that have developed. They typically develop due to overstraining, trauma, improper use of the joint affected, and even mental and physical stress. In the areas, such as the shoulder, where they can be felt, there will most oftentimes be pain associated on pressing into these points.

One very important factor with myofascial knotting is that it causes restriction in the joint that is affected (for example: its range of motion) and restricts the ability for the muscle to be elastic and to stretch to its normal length. It literally causes the muscles to tighten up. A good example of this is when one has such knots in their neck muscles. They will realize that they cannot rotate or flex their head to the levels they used to be able to. It has become restricted.

There are many areas in the penis, pelvis, and surrounding muscles that have fascia and myofascial membranes. Over time, by improper masturbation, pulling a pelvic muscle, lack of exercise, and other factors, these fascial membranes will develop similar knots. These knots will cause restrictions in the length and girth of the penis.

One simple method for relieving myofascial knots is to gently work on the with a finger or the head of a pencil eraser, for example. Applying gentle force to them in the specified region gets rid of these knots.

To test this, try feeling at the base of your skull, at the back of your neck. If you press into the areas on either side, typically you will find some of these knots. You can try working them out with your fingers and see the results. They will be sore, but after time you will feel these knots release and might even get rid of that headache.

There are many areas that need to be addressed. One simple area is just above where the penis attaches to the body. You can palpate this area and feel for these types of knots and try addressing them yourself. By releasing these restrictions, you can release more length to the penis.

To learn the important myofascial points that are restricting your penis and how to address these restrictions, read IRON MAN PENIS – The Russian System and start to put the “LARGE” in Penis En-LARGE-Ment.


Georg von Neumann