Any would be pick up artist should want to work hard on obliterating approach anxiety. It is probably the single greatest obstacle you will overcome on you route to becoming a genuinely successful P.U.A.
The thing is, most people don’t realise how easy it actually is to get past this initial problem in your quest for female company.
So how do you do it?
Firstly, realise that you have got to make approaches to get female company. The thing is, you have an 2 invisible barriers stopping you from making these approaches.
The first barrier is a mental one. This relates to how YOU think about this problem of approaching women. Then there is the physical or practical side of approach anxiety.
For now, I am only concerned with the mental side of the problem. And one thing is for sure – it is you that has got the problem and that problem my friend is mostly in your head.
To improve your effectiveness, you need to change your mindset. The way you think about the problem. What you don’t realise is that it is you that is putting up these barriers to your success. Once you recognise these barriers, you can address them and obliterate your approach anxiety.
One thing that most guys cannot understand is that the WORST thing that could happen is that you will be blown out. So what? One rejection more just means you are closer to an acceptance. You are developing yourself and that is a cause for celebration. Well done you! Give yourself a pat on the back.
You just have to learn to shrug rejection off. It is nothing personal.
And another thing – she rejects you because of her thoughts, not because of YOU. It is her, not YOU so get over it.
In the few seconds that you make your opening, she cannot possibly build a fair picture of you as a person. Could you? No. So realise that the only person who is going to feel bad about rejection is you, so just reject that bad feeling.
Secondly, embarrassment is a major reason for suffering approach anxiety but this again is all about perspective. Embarrassment is a personal and private thing. It is not something that most people dwell on when it is happening to others. If you feel embarrassed most people are not revelling in your woe, they are sympathising with your plight. So forget about embarrassment. It is irrelevant. Practice being indifferent to it and your skin will toughen.
It is only you that can make the feelings of rejection or embarrassment important so just don’t let them be important to you.
Thirdly, can the chat up lines. They only serve to put more pressure on you when you are already feeling anxious. If you are stressed by meeting someone why stress yourself more by trying to come over as Billy Connolly’s funner friend. It isn’t worth the extra stress!
If you screw up, you become more embarrassed and if you’re stressed you’ll look less confident.
Finally, put the outcome of your encounter out of your mind. With over 3 billion women in the world, I’m sure there is more than one or two who will do just fine for you. So many women, so many options – you are a kid in a candy store. You just don’t realise it!
Obliterating your approach anxiety is about mastering your emotions.
Once you realise that most of your mindset and your foolish wish to be the funniest man she’s ever met are making the problem worse, you realise how easy it is to overcome approach anxiety.
How long do you dwell on your encounters during the day? I guess you don’t. Just like everyone else doesn’t. So stop beating yourself up about whether you’ll be rejected, embarrassed, funny or lucky.